Cake Pop Flops

(Disclaimer:  I, under my own free will and choice, decided to make cake pops for the shower that I gave to my daughter-in-law on Saturday.  I alone made this decision.  In no way, shape, or form did Lisa pressure me into making this treat — she didn’t stomp her feet, flop to the floor and throw a temper tantrum, or cry buckets of tears.  She isn’t like that.  She’s very mature.)

Last week, I fell in love with cake pops.  I think they are so delightfully cute.  In the euphoria from learning about them, I thought I could easily make some.  After all, I reasoned, it’s not like a craft, you know.  How hard could they be to make?  It’s baking.  I can bake. It’s frosting what I bake.  I can do that.

Baking the cake went just fine.  Mixing the cake with the frosting went fine.  Shaping the mixture into balls went . . . well it went okay.  I didn’t think it would matter if they weren’t a perfectly smooth shape.  A little pokey-out-ey here and and a little pokey-out-ey there wouldn’t matter.  (Mistake number one.)

I put the pops in the freezer for a little while so they would firm up.  I melted yellow dipping chocolate (for I wanted to make smiley faces).  I got out the sucker sticks.  I got the pops out of the freezer.  I dipped one end of the stick into the chocolate and then plunged it into a pop until the end of the stick hit the cookie sheet.  (Mistake number two.  Should have only been half-way in.)  I put the pops back in the freezer.  (I planned on finishing the pops the eve before the shower.)

I was too cheap to buy Styrofoam to hold the finished pops.  (Mistake number three.)  I spray-painted three empty cereal boxes white.  (Mistake number four.)  The spray paint didn’t easily soak into the slick, waxy boxes.  Do you know how many coats of white paint it takes before the design on a cereal box doesn’t show through?  Too many.  I was too cheap to buy more spray paint.  (Mistake number five.)

On the eve of the shower, I retrieved the pops from the freezer and melted the rest of the yellow dipping chocolate.  I should have had either more chocolate or a deeper, narrower bowl.  Or both.  (Mistake number . . . oh forget it!)  This made it hard to cover the entire pop with the chocolate.

The pops were flat on the side where they had been resting on the cookie sheet while snuggling in the freezer.  And you know those little pokey-out-ies?  When covered with yellow chocolate they become very, very obvious.  I had flat-headed pops with leprosy.  Something that I was sure every guest would just be dying to eat.

This is what I got . . .

. . . instead of this . . .

The cardboard of the cereal boxes was too flimsy to hold the weight of the pops.  The cardboard smashed down.  The pops listed leeward.  The pops listed starboard.  They smacked into each other taking divots out of the yellow frosting.

I had purchased edible ink markers to draw smiley faces on the pops.  I’m not sure why but the marker didn’t work.  I could draw just fine on paper with the marker but not on the hardened leprosy of yellow chocolate on the pops.  So, now I had flat-headed, blind, leprosy pops with no smile.  I wanted to fling them across the kitchen.  But I didn’t.  (I just smashed the brains out of one of the pops when no one was looking.  I’m mature like that.)

I ended up serving the pops on plates.  They were very stable on their flat side.  Lisa tied a little ribbon on the stick that said ‘It’s a boy.’  The ribbon looked very nice.  The guests ate a few and murmured about how tasty they were.  They didn’t mention anything about how the pops looked.  They are mature like that.

I now have a deep respect for those who can make those beautiful cake pops.  It’s truly a gift that one is born with.  And making these cake pops IS a craft after all!

Add this craft to the myriad of others that I can’t do . . . .